Computer Joke

[Mike Casey]

>> For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way
>> computers have enhanced our lives, read on.
>> At a recent computer expo (COMDEX),Bill Gates reportedly compared the
>> computer industry with the auto industry and stated,
>>
>> 'If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we
>> would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon.'
>>
>> In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release
>> stating:
>>
>> If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving
>> cars with the following characteristics (and I just love this part):
>>
>> 1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash......... Twice a day.
>>
>> 2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to
>> buy a new car.
>>
>> 3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You
>> would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows,
>> shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could
>> continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.
>>
>> 4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause
>> your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would
>> have to reinstall the engine.
>>
>> 5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable,
>> five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only
>> five percent of the roads.
>>
>> 6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all
>> be replaced by a single 'This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation'
>> warning light.
>>
>> 7. The airbag system would ask 'Are you sure?' before deploying.
>>
>> 8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out
>> and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door
>> handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
>>
>> 9. Every time a new car was introduced, car buyers would have to learn
>> how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate
>> in the same manner as the old car.
>>
>> 10. You'd have to press the 'Start' button to turn the engine off
>>
>> PS - I'd like to add that when all else fails, you could call 'customer
>> service' in some foreign country and be instructed in some foreign
>> language how to fix your car yourself!!!!

[M.R. Ogle]

That is priceless!! Very funny!!!